Thank goodness for the iPhone — we can text, shoot birds at pigs, and get answers to hard questions.
Overheard of the Week
At El Chucho in Columbia Heights, the other night:
Man speaking into his iPhone: “Siri, is Nancy Reagan dead?”
After the jump: tourists, cool memorials, and Simpsons jokes.
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Why is the coolest memorial the most forgotten?
Tourists on Segways pass the White House on Constitution Avenue NW:
Girl in 20s, pointing to the flaming sword of the Second Division Memorial): “Look, the feather that signed the constitution!”
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If only
At 10th and G Streets NW, around 5:45 p.m. on a weekday:
Family of tourists, including three young kids, is walking along the sidewalk. A single pigeon is sitting in the gutter alongside.
Boy, about 6-years-old, to mother: “Mommy, are pigeons rare?”
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Well, that explains it
At H Street Country Club on the afternoon of August 4th:
A group of 20-somethings are talking about a man who’s been married three times.
Guy in the group: “Wow, three times?”
Girl: “Well, he’s 47.”
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Mostly Grandpa Simpson
Morning commute, 7th Street NW and Pennsylvania Avenue:
An older teen boy walks by with an older lady, maybe his mom.
Teen, totally deadpan: “What people don’t realize is, onion belts have been important to many cultures throughout history…”
(Video)
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Probably screaming at all the working escalators
Two men are working on the escalator at the L’Enfant Metro exit:
Older guy: “So what happened?”
Younger guy: “I got into some trouble in Vegas.”
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Imagine that
Late Friday night at Muzette karaoke bar in Adams Morgan:
Drunk guy in short printed shorts and a polo is standing at the bar with another broseph as they both read the clearly printed drink menus on the bar.
Drunk bro to broseph: “Hey, these sound like drinks.”
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You can tell he was waiting to use this joke for a long time
On the S2 bus southbound, Sunday afternoon:
Young guy: “You don’t sound like you’re from Mt. Pleasant.”
Young woman he’s trying to impress: “Is there a Mt. Pleasant accent?
Guy: “Yes!”
Woman: “What is it?”
Guy: “Spanish.”
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And finally, can you imagine?
A few days ago on the Red line at Gallery Place:
Two 20-something, hipstery tourists, a guy and girl, are amid a crowd of other tourists who just ducked in out of the rain.
Guy, gesturing to the train conductor’s cab at the front of the car: “Is that a bathroom? Do they have those?”
Girl, thinking for a moment: “No. It’s like a utility closet or something.”
