Photo by oddharmonic.Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
D.C. isn’t a place people think of as having its own dialect, but it’s there: “Surday” for Saturday, “‘bama,” and other local lingo. But aside from the words, there’s an accent too. Sometimes you just don’t think about it.
Overheard of the Week
A public charter school, somewhere in D.C.:
A first grade teacher enters her classroom to hear a colleague, who’s been showing the students a video explaining the cycle of water, trying to calm the children:
“No! That’s not a curse word! It’s little round pieces of ice that fall from the sky!”
After the jump, romance, apostrophes, strange dates and more.
Overheard in D.C. depends on you to hear and send in the good stuff. Make sure you send them to our special Overheard in D.C. email address and tell us all the info: who was speaking, to whom, where, in what context, and so on.
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Who says romance is dead
On K Street NW:
A man and woman are walking down the street. With a grin the guy pulls the woman toward a jewelry store that has a buzzer to be let in.
As he rings the store to be let in, she looks at him and says: “This better not be about an engagement ring, because if it is this is not going to end well for you.”
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The strangest thing about Metro are the eyes. Lifeless eyes, black eyes like a doll’s eyes…
On a Metro train:
Little girl, who is probably too young to read but must have had the sign explained to her earlier, is pointing at the icons along the bottom of the Metro map that illustrate the rules.
Little girl: “No music without earphones, no eating or drinking, no smoking, no pets except seeing eyes. Those are all the things you may not have on the Metro.”
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Your weekly bro-joke
Two Hill staffers, on a hot Blue Line Metro car from the game on Monday night:
Guy 1: “Yo, where’s my AC at bro?”
Guy 2: “It’s struggling.”
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This brunch date is going great
Sunday around 11:15 a.m. on Connecticut Avenue near the Woodley Park/Adams Morgan Metro:
A 20-something man and woman pass by.
Woman to man: “That looks just like my soul. Do you know how clean it is?”
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This is what happens if you abuse apostrophes: All Hell breaks loose
At a conference in Crystal City:
Two women from out of town are eating breakfast waiting for the session to start. Woman 1 has established herself as the D.C. expert by explaining that she used to work for the D.C. government before moving to the Midwest.
Woman 2: “So how do I get to that Morgans Adam?”
Woman 1: “Morgans Adam is on the Red Line.”
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What constitutes a bad one?
Two 40-ish guys on bikes on the Mount Vernon Trail:
One guy says to the other “You know, I have never been against a good bombing.”
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A good argument for why this trend should stop
On the Silver Spring Metro station platform:
Young woman to friends talking about a recent party: “I thought Julie was twerking but she was just peeing outside.”
(Name changed to protect the guilty)
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And finally, something to ponder
About 5 p.m. leaving Arlington Cemetery on the Blue Line:
Metro operator: “And your next station is … the next station.”
[Laughter]
Rider: “It is very Zen. Wherever you are, you are.”
[Laughter]