We are all Beyonce. (Getty Images)
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
In this week’s Overheard, we’re reminded that, when under the judgmental glare of a friend who doesn’t understand we’re Grown, we can turn to one of the most inspiring humans to ever live. I’m referring, of course, to the almighty Beyoncé.
Overheard of the Week
At a bar on U Street NW
Waiting in line for the bathroom, a woman in her mid-20s is taking what is obviously a booty call. Her friends are watching from the other room. When she walks back to her friends, she stands momentarily in the doorway then shouts.
Woman: “What?! I am independent! I am strong! And I do not need your judgement! I can make my own decisions! I am Beyoncé!”
As always, Real, Original Overheard in D.C. relies on you to submit the good stuff to our special Overheard in D.C. email address. Make sure to tell us who, where and in what context, too.
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Sure it is
In Farragut Square near the food trucks.
A group of people who appear to be interns walk by. A young man looks at the food trucks.
Young man: “Oooh. This is what they mean by restaurant week.”
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Oh, that part
On the G2 Metro bus on the evening of January 15
A woman is telling a friend about her future plans with her boyfriend.
Woman: “Once I get my house in Chevy Chase, I’ll be fine.”
Friend: “What part of Chevy Chase?”
Woman: “The good part.”
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A real patriot
Outside the 9:30 Club on a Saturday for MIXTAPE, a gay dance party.
Man to friend in line: “Why are you in line? I thought you had a ticket already?”
Friend: “I did, but an extra Marine showed up so my ticket went to him.”
Guy behind them in line: “THERE ARE MARINES IN THERE!?”
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The cute girl said a cute thing on the cute cute cute
On the Red Line toward Glenmont on a recent Sunday evening.
A 20-something couple is having a loud conversation about his physical features.
Girl: “And you have such a cute little dick.”
Guy: “WHAT?! Those are not the adjectives I want to hear!”
Girl: “I didn’t mean it that way!”
Guy: “You said I had a cute little dick! How else could you mean it?”
Girl: “Do you know how often I use the words cute and little? It’s like my entire vocabulary!”
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You sound fun!
At 25th and K streets NW in Georgetown on a Friday evening around 9:30 p.m.
A girl wearing fancy Tory Burch flats in the rain is talking in a panicky and whiny tone on her phone.
Girl: “I have been walking up and down this street for an hour. I’m tired. I’m cold. I’m starving. AND I’M SOBER!”
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Spoiler alert
At a 4 p.m. showing of Her at Landmark Bethesda Row.
The scene where Theodore Twombly (Joaquin Phoenix) and Samantha the operating system (Scarlett Johansen) have “sex” ends.
A woman who appears to be 60 to 70-years-old whispers to her friend: “I want to buy this OS!!”
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LOL THIS ONE AGAIN
In Dupont Circle on a recent Monday.
A group of friends is standing outside Subway, chatting.
Girl: “Ugh, it’s so cold today.”
Guy: “It’s colder in New York.”
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