Photo by T.D. FordWelcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
It’s almost summer, so the interns are back. They’re filling up offices—but probably not doing much work—and partying at bars around the Hill (and at the Front Page). Most of them are smart and hard-working, but others either need to work on their vocabulary or reconsider their choices.
Overheard of the Week
In the afternoon in the gym in a Capitol Hill building:
Intern 1 to Intern 2: “It literally tasted like shit.”
After the jump, the rare nice tourist, Alexandria, and weird doctors.
Our official Overheard email address has changed! Please email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com from now on, and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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Thank you! (And clearly you haven’t been here in July)
On the train during Friday morning rush hour while the Red Line is single tracking:
As people cram onto the train, a tourist says to his wife and daughter: “At least it’s D.C. so everyone smells good.”
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Next: diagnosis via emoji
On the sidelines of an ultimate frisbee game in Arlington:
Two moms are talking about their boys:
Mom 1: “Jeff has been having a lot of trouble this week with the tree pollen.”
Mom 2: “I know! Our allergist just tweeted about tree pollen!”
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Hey everybody! Free bikes!
Outside the Ronald Reagan Building:
Three gentlemen in their forties, probably coming back from lunch, are talking about their bikes, and presumably problems with their bikes.
Man 1: “You know, you can just leave it unlocked at the bike rack and it will probably get stolen.”
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LOLexandria
At District Taco in Old Town Alexandria:
A mid-forties woman sits down with three friends and their food. They’re talking about upcoming plans.
Woman: “You know, I’m supposed to be in the Bahamas next week for my juice fast.”
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If only Metro trains and Metrobuses were as cool as the operators
On Orange Line train leaving McPherson Square around 6 p.m. Friday evening:
Metro train operator over the intercom: “Young man, I know that chicken wing is tasting real good right now, but imma need you to wrap it up and put it away. No food allowed on Metro. Thank you.”
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College.
On the GWU campus in the evening:
Three colleged-age women are walking. One of them to the others: “But you have a boyyyyyfriend! Keep your vagina together!!”
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Maybe she really wanted a french toast bagel
In line at Panera in Chinatown:
Tourist dad and little girl (about 7-years-old) are talking.
Little girl: “There!”
Dad: “Where? Outside talking?”
Little girl: “Yeah!”
Dad: “That’s not Michelle Obama.”
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And finally, bet you are really fun at parties
At the Star & Shamrock on H Street during their “Family Friendly St. Patrick’s Day” on Sunday afternoon before actual St. Paddy’s Day:
A group of four twenty-somethings stomp out of the bar, past groups of families with small children and a group of young Irish dancers.
The last woman of the twenty-something bunch, clearly annoyed, says to the bouncer in a condescending tone: “I thought it’s illegal to bring children into a bar in D.C.”
That same woman then calls the police, reporting “Children in a restaurant during my durnkin’ time.”
The police show up, speak to the bouncers, and everyone summarily laughs it off.
