Photo by Shamila Chaudhary
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
The primary season is upon us, which means bars in the D.C. area fill with debate watch parties and the news relentless dissects the horse race. However, that doesn’t mean everyone in D.C. is an informed voter.
Overheard of the Week
At Target:
Two 20-something year old guys are buying beer and frozen pizza.
Guy 1: “Dude, I’ve never voted for a Republican, but maybe I will this time.”
Guy 2: “Why?
Guy 1: “I dunno. I mean, Ben Carson’s a scientist. I study science, so I figure I have more in common with him than anyone.”
Guy 2: “Yeah, but do you believe in his politics?”
Guy 1: “He’s a SCIENTIST. I don’t know his politics but I’m sure it’s right.”
(Same guys, a bit later.)
Guy 2: “Did we get enough food?”
Guy 1: “It depends how much weed we smoke.”
After the jump, more debaters, cute kids, and goofballs.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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It would be interesting to see this
Crossing Pennsylvania Avenue at 3rd street in front of the Capitol:
Twenty-something woman walking alone wearing ear buds and talking VERY loudly into her hands-free microphone while gesticulating emphatically: “I’m telling you, he doesn’t give a flying fuck. I mean, literally, a flying fuck.”
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Or the collective rage of delayed riders?
On the Red Line heading west from Union Station:
A group of young women are standing in the aisle, talking. The train is unusually warm.
Woman 1: “I feel like it’s always hot on the Red Line.”
Woman 2: “It’s the color. Red. It’s a warm color.”
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Pandawwww
At a bus stop at 16th and Spring Rd NW:
Little boy to little girl: “Am I Bao Bao? Are you Bao Bao? Is he Bao Bao?”
Little girl: “Everything Bao Bao!”
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Thanks, Obama?
At a Republican debate watch party:
A mid-20s (Democratic) professional woman to her friends: “This is my first job where I don’t have a bourbon drawer.”
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Preemptive
A Starbucks near L’Enfant Plaza, Monday after work:
Man in his late 30s enters and orders a coffee: “Eleven shots of sweetener. Don’t you judge me.”
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Little known reason behind the UN’s founding
Waiting in a long line to pay at the DCUSA parking garage on 14th Street in Columbia Heights:
Mid-20s woman to the group of friends with her: “They should have free parking here. It’s a fundamental human right.”
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Figuring it out
On the Red line from Dupont Circle toward Shady Grove during PM rush hour:
A group of women are talking about work.
Woman 1: “My team is just three people. An executive director, an assistant director, and then my title is Program Coordinator.”
Woman 2: “So basically you do all the work.”
Woman 1: “100%.”
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This kid knows what’s up
At Bagels and Baguettes near the Capitol:
Five or six year old boy to his mom after looking studiously at the breakfast menu: “Everything good has cheese and everything that isn’t good has no cheese.”
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Not a good sign
On Spring Road NW:
Two DC Water utility workers are standing around an open manhole looking flummoxed.
Worker 1: “I got a lot of shit going on right now.”
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And there’s your hot train
On a very crowded morning Red line train heading downtown, while the Red Line is experiencing delays. The train stops at Woodley Park station:
Woman on the platform immediately and loudly as the doors open: “Can people move to the center of the train! Some of us waited on the platform for a very long time!”
A bunch of people on the train, in unison: “So did we!”
