Photo by Ronnie R
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
Back in medieval times, barbers were also surgeons and dentists. They aren’t anymore, but maybe some people haven’t caught up with the times.
Overheard of the Week
At the Aveda salon on 14th Street:
Older woman getting her hair washed: “So you know anything about those chakra oils up front?”
Stylist: “Yes, what would you like to know?”
Woman: “Which one I should use for my GI tract issues?”
Stylist: “Ummm… I don’t know that. But I’ll find out!”
(Later)
Stylist: “It’s Chakra 1 and 2, and cranberry”
(Later)
Stylist: “No, I think you just drink the cranberry juice. We don’t sell that.”
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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Good advice
Walking down Wisconsin Ave in Tenleytown:
20-something woman to 20-something man: “I used to be hot. Then I went to law school. Now I look like this. I tell my friends: don’t go to law school!”
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Bad advice
On the King Street Trolley in Alexandria during the evening rush hour:
Man talking very loudly to a passenger across from him: “If you’re not getting your news from Rush Limbaugh, then you have no idea what’s going on. Or worse, you’re a flaming liberal.”
Passenger: “I just moved here from Germany, and I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
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Deep
At Washington Circle:
Three early 20-somethings are talking.
Guy to girl: “Well it’s not called Virginia Taco! It’s in the District.”
Girl: “Yeah, that’s why it’s District Taco.”
Other guy: “Yup.”
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Well, you can’t see both
Monday lunchtime in Lafayette Square while sitting on a bench facing Pennsylvania Ave:
A group of kids is around trying to figure out why the street is blocked.
One kid turns to the parents: “Yeah, all the cops would say is someone is coming out.”
Another kid: “Ooohhh ohhhh. I totally want to see the president, or I want to see Barack Obama!”
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The first time anyone has accused airport food of being too fancy
Lunchtime at DCA:
A middle-aged couple from out of town steps up to look at the menu.
The wife says, “I can’t even read this.”
Husband decides to take a look: “Look honey, salad! Oh, mixed greens. We know that’s not lettuce.”
They walk away.
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The only way to stay sane if you’re a D.C. football fan
Wednesday morning around 8 a.m., on the H8 bus heading to the Petworth Metro station:
Two middle-aged residents are arguing Cowboys vs. Washington Football Team.
“I used to be a [Washington football team] fan. But I actually pay more attention to them now than when I was a fan. Now I can watch them for comic relief.”
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Hmm.
Near the entrance to Union Station at the end of the work day:
Man is discussing happy hour plans on his cell phone: “If they were like, ‘You have to murder the person next to you, but martinis are five dollars,’ I would do it. And I don’t even like martinis.”
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Can’t tell if nice or not
Saturday night in Georgetown, at the intersection of M Street and Wisconsin Avenue:
A middle-aged father with his son (8 or so) was looking at his phone, trying to figure out where he was. He turned to the panhandler who was seated on the sidewalk and asked, “Do you know where Paolo’s is?”
The panhandler, 40-ish, pointed north up Wisconsin and said, “Paolo’s? Yeah, it’s up that way about two blocks.”
“Really?” the man asked.
“You think I’m lying? Paolo’s. Two blocks that way. It’ll be on the right. You’ll see it.”
The man got out his wallet and gave the panhandler some money.
As they were walking up Wisconsin, the man tells his son “I gave him three dollars. You can’t really do anything with just a dollar.”
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Life lessons!
At Farragut Square:
Two women walking with a group of girls, ages 6-9.
Woman to one of the girls: “It takes a lot of money and paperwork”
Girl: “So you just pretend you’re divorced?”
Woman: “We’re working on it.”