Photo by Paul Scott.

Photo by Paul Scott.

Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.

Pokemon is seemingly everywhere now. And it’s a topic of conversation.


Overheard of the Week


Outside 7-Eleven in Mount Rainier, MD on Monday afternoon:

Mid-20s guy talking on the phone: “Yep, that’s how you kidnap a 28 year old. Tell ’em there’s a rare Pokemon in there.”

After the jump, tourists, bros and more.

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.

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Offset!


Outside Seventh Hill pizza near Eastern Market:

A group of friends passes three Human Rights Campaign volunteers and declines to stop. One of them turns to his friend and says, “I always stop and give them money after I’ve eaten at Chick-fil-a.”

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What kind of food works best on acid?


Saturday evening on 14th Street around Barrel House Liquors:

Two or three bro-y mid-20s-looking guys were walking together, and one is apparently relaying a conversation he had with someone to the other guys: “I said, ‘Today’s the only day I’m taking acid in hopefully a long time so I’m happy to buy you dinner!'”

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Truly offensive

From a fenced a backyard in Capitol Hill:

A bunch of kids are running around and making a lot of noise.

One kid to the rest: “You’re going to cut off my head! And flush it down the toilet! How dare you!”

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“I have to tell you about a man”

At DCA on June 24:

Gate agent over the PA system: “The woman who was going to Nantucket? The woman who was going to a dinner party, please see me at the podium.”

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How much you catch, bro?

In the Vineyard Vines at Tyson’s Galleria:

Two young male employees are folding clothes.

Employee 1 to Employee 2: “I caught a Charizard at the gym today.”
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Whodathunkit

A man and his son at the Air and Space Museum, viewing a picture of a telescope:

Man: “They made that in the 1700s, hard to believe they were that smart back then.”

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Get them started young?


At Union Kitchen Grocery on 3rd Street NE on Wednesday morning:

Two Capitol Hill moms and three kids all under the age of five are sitting in the window booth. One of the toddlers is sitting on the ground pouting.

Mom: “Elizabeth is peacefully protesting what we are having for breakfast this morning.”

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Fun fact, they have courts there too


While getting shuffled around and waiting to potentially have to serve on a jury:

Woman in late 30s: “It’s enough to make you move to Canada.”

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Tour de France humor

Two parents on a bench at the Rose Park tot lot as a dozen or so tourists struggle up the path on Bikeshare bikes:

“Oh look it’s the peloton from Le Tour de Bikeshare … and it looks like mom is about to go off the back.”

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British humor

At a Metro station:

British person 1: “Do you know where we are going?”
British person 2: “Shady Grove.”
British person 1: “Shady Grove … Right next to Dodgy Forest.”

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People like Chinatown because it’s so authentic

Three guys in Chinatown on Friday morning are talking about strip clubs:

Guy in pants: “Why aren’t you wearing pants?”
Guy in shorts: “Do strip clubs have dress codes?”
Guy in pants: “Well, no one has gotten a hand job in cargo shorts since ‘Nam”

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Were there kangaroos?

Two women in their 50’s waiting in line one afternoon at Starbucks on Connecticut and N:

Woman 1: “The company was either Swiss or Austrian. Those are different things right? Swiss and Austrian?”
Woman 2: “Um…”
Woman 1: “…Anyway, I think they were Austrian.”

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Farmers would know

Morning at Woodley Park Metro Station, going down the escalators onto the platform:

A group of 50+ high schoolers in Future Farmers of America jackets from various states are making their way down during rush hour.

High schooler 1: “We’re so far underground it’s starting to get foggy!”
High schooler 2, in a worried tone: “I don’t think that’s fog.”