Photo by Geoff Livingston
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
It’s been a big week. But maybe there’s hope for the future.
Overheard of the Week
On Georgia Avenue on Wednesday afternoon:
Two high school age girls are walking with an adult, possibly a teacher
Girl 1: “People voted for Harambe!”
Girl 2: “15,000!”
Girl 1, disgusted: “They voted for a deceased! gorilla!”
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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Who says tourists don’t get out
At the National Museum of African American History, near closing time last week:
There is a (typical) long queue for the women’s bathroom.
A toilet whooshes loudly.
Woman 1 (to no one in particular): “WOW these are like the toilets in New York!”
Whole line stares in confusion.
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Lynch gone wild?
15th & P on Thursday evening:
Two senior citizens push along a friend in a wheelchair.
One friend to the other: “Speaking of condoms and vodka bottles, the Justice department just…[conversation fades out]”
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Thanks, New Coke fans
Lunchtime at Glen’s Garden Market Dupont:
A group of young professionals offer some valuable feedback: “They should really take some lessons from Subway.”
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The kids are alright
November 5 at a 7-Eleven in Arlington:
A mom and her elementary school aged son just bought Sluprees and are checking out.
Mom laughs and points at a pack of two half pound Reese’s Cups.
He gasps, slaps a hand to his forehead Scarlet O’Hara style: “We have to buy it.”
Mom: “No way.”
Son: “But we *need* it.”
Mom: “No.”
Son (very quickly changing tactics): “But really, *you* need it. Mommy, can I buy you a present?”
Mom: “No.”
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Who said romance is dead
Saturday at 9:45 p.m. on 14th Street just south of U:
Two mid-20s women are chatting about a mutual female friend and her on-again/off-again boyfriend: “He doesn’t even really want to date her… he just loves her boobs.”
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True story
A man and woman are waiting to cross H Street:
A car is sitting parallel across the middle of the road, blocking traffic in both directions.
Woman: “What is that guy doing?”
Man: “He’s from Maryland. They don’t have lines on roads there.”
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Whiskey
At the Dupont Farmers market on November 6:
Husband: “What else do we need for dinner this week?”
Wife: “I’ll be out Wednesday and Thursday and stress eating chocolate every meal on Tuesday so I think we’re good.”
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Simpler times?
Tuesday early afternoon at Pacci’s Pizza in Silver Spring:
A late 20s-early 30s couple is talking.
Woman: “Okay, I’ve asked a lot of people this, and no one is ever able to articulate it clearly. Are different kinds of fish like different flavors of Jolly Rancher, where the basic structure is the same but different flavors can taste vastly different, or are they like different candies, like Laffy Taffy is very different from Jolly Ranchers?”
Man: [sounding bored] “Different flavors of Jolly Rancher.”
Woman: “Wow. That’s the most definitive answer I’ve ever gotten. I’ve never had anybody just answer the question clearly. Normally people try to debunk it. The most common answer I’ve gotten is that most of them are like different Jolly Ranchers, but salmon is different. It’s Laffy Taffy.”
