Photo by jng03

Photo by jng03

Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.

Visiting D.C. is fun! But there are some things we’d recommend against.

Overheard of the Week

On Pennsylvania Avenue in front of White House:

A big family of tourists is walking.

Dad points at the White House and offers to all the kids, “I’ll give you twenty dollars if you can get all the way inside that building!”

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.

After the jump, comedians, workouts, and bicyclists.

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Yep

Monday at 5 p.m. at the top of a shutdown escalator at the at Gallery Place Metro:

Commuter: “It’s just STEPS!”

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Culture wars!

In Crystal City outside Chipotle:

30-something guys are talking.

Guy 1: “Are they really doing a spin class outside… in front of a bunch of people eating lunch?”
Guy 2: “This is the pinnacle of ‘look how healthy I am’ bullshit.”
Guy 3: “And I get shit for my gym selfies?”

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Life is so hard in D.C.

Thursday afternoon, Peet’s Coffee in Penn Quarter:

Two twenty-something women, one having just arrived and joined the other.

New arrival: “I walked four blocks to get here. You’re nowhere near Metro.”

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Seems kind of like part of the job

A Friday evening around 6 p.m. at Sticky Fingers in Columbia Heights:

Two mid-twenties uniformed EMTs, a man and woman, are in line.

Man, shaking his head: “Man, I ain’t delivering any babies… I haaaaate that.”
Woman shakes her head: “Oh I know!”

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Thanks, kid

On a stuck Longworth Office Building elevator:

It’s around the 25 minute mark of a 40 minute wait with 8 people, 4 of whom are a family of tourists from New Jersey. After lots of clanking, bangs, and trips up and down, the youngest daughter exclaims: “This is just like the Tower or Terror!”

The elevator comes to a halt with an enormous loud jolt.

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Sounds about right


Walking down 14th street around 1 a.m. on a Saturday night:

An early-twenties couple is walking. The guy was clearly trying to impress the lady, who seemed enthralled.

Man: “I went to a Kanye concert.”
Woman: “Really?!”
Man: “Yeah, in college.”
Woman: “Oh my goodness!”
Man: “Yeah, it was just him ranting about things, but isn’t that part of the experience?”

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Is this just confined to the Hill or has it expanded?

Two young professionals, walking and talking at lunchtime downtown:

“That place is crazy now that there are so many Republicans in town. I used to be able to go in and just drink my martini in peace. Liberals didn’t fill the place up or at least were unassuming about it. Now it’s just filled with a bunch of loud old Wall Street white guys yapping about taking my health care and blah blah blah abortion.”

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Finally some sense about cupcakes

On M Street in Georgetown:

College age woman: “I can’t justify a $5 cupcake. It’s gone in two bites. $5 gets you a decent amount of ice cream.”

Her friends all nod in agreement eating their cupcakes.

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Yeah, watch out for falling plants from those million dollar condos across the street

Outside the Lincoln Theatre after the Ben Gibbard show:

Guy to friend: “I always feel unsafe leaving the 9:30 Club.”

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