Photo by Victoria Pickering
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
D.C. has a lot of things going for it, but getting permits to do basically anything is not one of them. Just ask basically anyone.
Overheard of the Week
Outside of the under renovation Mint gym on K Street:
Two contractors are discussing work delays.
Worker 1: “What’s taking so long with this job??”
Worker 2: “Damned if I know. It’s easier to get appointed a Supreme Court justice than it is to get a building permit in this town.”
——
Tough kids
Going apple picking at Stribling Orchard in Virginia:
Mom: “We can’t leave until we find your dad.”
Teenage daughter: “We got out of the car and he went the opposite direction from the rest of us. Let’s just leave. He can fend for himself.”
——
Cue the “millennials are destroying X” articles
At a local coffee shop in Dupont Circle:
Millennial chatting with out-of-town friend: “My neighborhood would be great, if it just had a mini-Target.”
——
Reading is FUNdamentally hip
At Kramerbooks at 1 a.m. after Art All Night:
Guy to his friends: “It’s hipster to go to a bookstore this late at night.”
——
More cogent analysis than most TV news
In front of the Willard Intercontinental:
Two girls run up to the statues of the Democratic Donkey and Republican Elephant.
Older sister jumps onto the elephant’s back and bounces.
Younger sister: “I don’t like the stupid donkey, I wanna ride the elephant!”
——
Morning person
In Capitol Hill:
A driver is waiting to pick someone up at about 6 a.m. on Saturday morning. The driver has a deep, scruffy voice and the car’s radio is not on. He suddenly starts singing “Eye of the Tiger” very loudly to himself.
Driver: “Dun! Dun Dun Dun! Dun Dun Dun! Dun Dun Duunnnnnnn.”
(Pause)
“I could sing this shit for hours!”
(Pause)
“Rising up, back on the street, did my time, took my chances….”
——
Not a traffic circle fan?
In Dupont around minding on Saturday:
Two mid-twenties men walking: “God bless this terribly designed city.”
——
Well, there’s that
Outside the Supreme Court during the anti-Kavanaugh protest:
People starting to move to the steps so they can see. The police start moving holding a sign off the steps with no explanation, just telling them to move off.
Police officer: “Free speech stops at the marble.”
——
At least someone listens to those announcements—or, is a budding transit fan!
At Metro Center:
A train arrives and the doors open. There’s a mother with cute maybe 4-year old daughter with backpack and a baby son.
Daughter: “Mommy, is this a 7000-series train?”
——
One of many great things about D.C.
At Pitchers sports bar on Friday, October 6:
Drag queen talking to fellow patrons, dropping her persona: “Okay, but really, who heard Senator Collins’ speech today?”
——
Cute Metro riding kids say the darnedest things
On the Metro:
Same cute toddler as above looks at two riders wearing eyeliner.
Daughter: “Mommy, do you paint your eyes black like that?”
Mom: “Yes, sometimes”
Daughter: “I never tried that before.”
Mom: “I have some at home, we can try it when we go home.”
Daughter, fist pumping: “YYEESSS!”
——
As always, we rely on you to overheard the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.
