Photo by Lorie Shaull
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
It can be a tough job to be a children’s coach: you’re teaching a sport, but you also have to be a mentor, give life lessons, and teach kids about the world. And sometimes you just have to figure out how to connect with them.
Overheard of the Week
At the Capitals Iceplex in Ballston, Sunday afternoon:
Boys’ hockey coach, speaking to his team of tweens: “How many of you are familiar with the concept of ‘carpe diem’?”
Kids: “Whaaat?!’
Coach: “It means ‘seize the day.’ It’s like ‘YOLO’ for not-stupid people.”
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This is why you call your kids for computer help
On the Circulator to Union Station:
Man in his 60s on a cell phone: “What you need to do is call human resources at Facebook and see if they can change your email.”
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Harsh words
At the Dupont Circle farmers market:
Two women peek into a booth selling t-shirts, contemplating going in for a closer look:
“I don’t know… it looks too hash-taggy for me.”
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That feared D.C. mafia
Two women in business attire walking on 17th St near Farragut North:
Women 1: “So I told him fine, take the gun, just leave the cannoli.”
Women 2 nods head in agreement.
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Overseen in D.C.
On the Red Line as the train comes into Gallery Place:
Passengers stand up to get out. There’s a man standing in front of the door, facing it and reading a magazine. The train stops and the doors open. The man continues reading and does not move. Passengers have to duck and squeeze.
He’s reading Mindful magazine.
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Wrong on many levels
On the Red Line between Farragut North and Dupont Circle on a Friday evening:
Woman in her early 20s speaking to two men in their early 20s: “He has to have gone to a state school like Georgetown if he got that job. Georgetown is state, not private, right? That has to be it.”
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Is this the corollary to not cheap, inexpensive?
In Eaton Workshop on K Street NW:
A guy in his late 20s talking to a group of friends: “I’m not rich, I’m wealthy.”
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Well, we got Tang and astronaut ice cream out of the deal
At the AMC Georgetown theatre:
Two tweens discussing the movie Last Man: “We did all that just to beat the Soviets? I mean, how stupid!”
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It’s fine, you can say grande
At Starbucks:
Guy to barista: “What’s the most medium size you have?”
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AARP that!
During an obviously-a-first-date date at Room 11:
Late-20s guy: “Yeah, it’s the third job in a row I’ve had where the organization changed its name from an acronym to just a string of letters that supposedly no longer mean anything. It’s the hip new thing for non-profits.”
Woman: “Uh huh.”
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Why not both?
At Soapstone in Van Ness:
“It’s National Coming Out Day? I thought it was National Donut Day. I must’ve read it wrong.”
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Art inspires different people in different ways
Friday night at Denizens in Silver Spring:
A father is holding his son, about 5, up to the urinal.
Child, clearly coming to the end of his “business”: (singing) “Shake it off, shake it off.”
Dad, flatly: “That’s not what that song is about.”
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As always, we rely on you to overheard the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.
