Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
You don’t really think about what’s on stamps too often. But lately, they seem to be pretty accurate.
Overheard of the Week:
Friday afternoon at the Friendship Heights Post Office:
70-ish-year-old woman to postal clerk: “Do you have any love stamps?”
Clerk, after looking through the selection: “We’re out of love. All we have is peace.”
Woman: “I’ll take it.”
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Phonetic phonetic alphabet
At BWI:
An airport employee into their phone: “Bravo Three. Bravo. B. Bravo as in Boy.”
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D.C. is truly amazing
On Massachusetts Ave. near the Walmart:
A middle-aged couple with March for Life gear is crossing the street.
The wife exclaims: “Goodness! They have a Walmart here. Can you believe it?”
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Where does one get this certificate?
At the C&O Canal at 30th Street NW:
Two men in their early 30s are walking toward M Street
One says the other: “I’m literally allowed to tell you what to think. I get paid to do that. I have a LICENSE.”
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Uh
At Decades in Dupont Circle:
Early 20’s woman in a group talking to an early 20’s guy (both obviously drunk)
“How do you know if you’re circumcised? Did your mom tell you?”
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Communication is key in relationships
At Fairfax Hyundai:
Woman talking on her cellphone: “Dude! You’ve been married to me for four years now. What makes you think I’d ever be okay with two dead sheep hanging in my laundry room?”
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I believe the children are our future
Thursday afternoon before the March for Life at the Botanic Gardens:
A group of high school students wearing March for Life beanies are walking through the Botanic Gardens along with an adult (presumably a teacher) and a nun.
Teenage boy whispers to peer: “This is honestly better than the Bible Museum.”
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Wait, I thought only millenials thought this
At a hotel bar five blocks from the White House:
A middle-aged woman sharing war stories with another during happy hour: “Everyone thinks they’re special. But deep inside, I know it’s true.”
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Metro things
Two 20-somethings get board a Shady Grove-bound Red Line train:
Train PA announcement: “This train is being held for a schedule adjustment.”
Man, frustrated: “I’ll adjust your schedule, Metro.”
Woman, also frustrated: “I wish you actually could.”
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Yep
During the Women’s March:
On Pennsylvania Avenue after having just chanted past the Trump Hotel, the group is about to turn up 11th Street.
One woman to a friend: “Oh, are we turning a corner?”
Friend: “Let’s hope so!”
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