Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006. Check out the archives here.

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context. 

You might notice we have fewer overheards than normal. We’re taking that as a sign that folks are staying home and socially distant — good job! But as a result, we are now taking submissions for eavesdropping on video conferencing calls and all of the other newfangled ways we’re staying in touch.

Overheard of the Week:

Rowdy group leaving Chaplin’s at 10:50 p.m. on a Monday night. A woman’s voice breaking through the noise:

“I’m better than ALL of you!”

—

She’s got this under control

A gray-haired cyclist slowly approaches a bike rack across from the U.S. Supreme Court the weekend after RBG’s death. He’s towing a 7-year-old girl with a unicorn helmet:

7-year-old: “Steady there, Grandpa.”
Onlooker, to cyclist: “I guess we know who’s in charge here.”

—

Wait, but are you sure?

Docent answering a young child viewing Washington’s tomb at Mt. Vernon:

“No, I don’t think there’s a buried treasure in there.”

—

They’re so cute, though

Hippie-looking twentysomething talking to her two hippie-looking friends while drinking coffee at Union Market:

“Dolphins are just, like, barbaric.”

—

They do say fashion repeats itself

Two women in their 20s shopping at Bed Bath & Beyond:

One woman to the other: “My style is modern old-fashioned.”

—

Nov 8, 2019: He’s probably on one of the remixes

In Adams Morgan, a 6-year-old boy is talking excitedly with his parents:

Kid: “And did you know they named someone after Duke Ellington Bridge?”
Dad: “I’m pretty sure that they named the bridge after a person, not the other way around. He was a famous musician.”
Kid: “Oh. Did he write ‘Old Town Road’?”

—

Oct. 5, 2018: #resist

At TJ Maxx in Alexandria:

Dressing room attendant: “Oh good! So you liked that dress?”
Lady: “Yeah! I hate that it’s Ivanka Trump, but at least she’s going out of business.”