Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006. Check out the archives here.

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context. 

You might notice we have fewer overheards than normal. We’re taking that as a sign that folks are staying home and socially distant — good job! But as a result, we are now taking submissions for eavesdropping on video conferencing calls and all of the other newfangled ways we’re staying in touch.

Overheard of the Week 

A couple in their mid-30s is shopping at a grocery store just outside of Old Town, Alexandria. The guy holds up a canister of raisins:

Woman: “In all the years we’ve been together, I’ve never seen you eat raisins, and all the sudden, you want to buy a huge container!”
Man: “I eat raisins.”

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May 22, 2020: Better late than never

In Meridian Hill Park, two yo-pro dudes hanging out: 

Man 1: “Yeah, this quarantine has really made me appreciate my family a lot more. Before, I never would have sent my mother flowers for Mother’s Day or Valentine’s Day, but last week, I sent her two bouquets in the same week, one for each holiday!”
Man 2: “Um … Valentine’s Day is in February … ”

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Oct. 11, 2019: Way to keep farmers’ market stereotypes alive 

Two late-twenties/early-thirties guys are at the Columbia Heights farmers market:

Man 1: “Ooooh they have kiwi berries! I write poetry about these.”

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Feb. 24, 2017: A good question

A group of eight people in varying degrees of professional dress to casual dress exit an office building in Georgetown, walking towards K Street:  

Woman 1: “Where are we going?”
Man (all-knowing local?): “Let’s head over to Georgetown.”
Woman 1: “Where is that?”
Man looks around a bit, then poins to the intersection of M and Thomas Jefferson: “It’s up at that light.”
Woman 2: “What is Georgetown? A place or a restaurant?”

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Dec. 16, 2016: Oui

A mid-twenties man and woman are eating together at a lunch spot on L Street:

Man: “What’s that other French restaurant you like?”
Woman: “Uhhhh … I don’t remember. Oh, Au Bon Pain.”

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Dec. 8, 2015: You might want to consider looking for a new job

An early 20’s man is commiserating to a group of (presumed) coworkers near Farragut Square:

“This is like the third week in a row I’ve been called a little bitch at work.”

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April 17, 2015: Love in D.C.

A drunk woman and drunk guy are walking down a street n Clarendon on a Saturday night:

Woman to guy: “If you really love me, find me on LinkedIn.”

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As always, we rely on you to overhear the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.