Last year, the Washington Redskins were a football team only a neoconservative could love. A season opening touchdown run by Clinton Portis kicked off the campaign with a shocking, awesome touchdown run. But by midseason, the team had gotten bogged down. It was clear that the defensive unit was capable of winning the war, but week in and week out, it was just as evident that the offense was taking the field without a plan to win the game. That was the weekly standard. Soon, we were told that aging quarterback Mark Brunell was in his last throws. Despite incremental progress, including a satisfying season-ending win over the Vikings, the season was a quagmire of frustrated hopes.

Yes, the Redskins truly are the sum of all metaphors, and we could have run with it even further: the in-fighting during the offseason, the casualties of free agency. We were even all set to photoshop up a picture of Sean Taylor with a cigarette dangling out of his mouth, jauntily pointing at some stolen all-terrain vehicles — but you know what? The past is past. And the awful preseason, which for Redskins fans culminated in a white knuckle battle to determine who the starting punter would be, is mercifully over. The new season is upon us.

It is the opinion of the touts that the 2005 season is going to be a long and difficult one for the Redskins, and many are predicting that the team may not even match its lousy 6-10 mark of a year ago. And the reason for this offense is the offense—miserable throughout the past year, and not exactly looking like it’s undergone much improvement. After all the quarterback mishegas of a year ago, the bad news is that Patrick Ramsey hasn’t done anything during the preseason to inspire much confidence. And the worse news? Brunell looked the sharpest. The team lost overall size at the wideout position, and, based on past performance, swapping Laveranues Coles for Santana Moss is a straight up downgrade any way you slice it.