Everyone has that one friend. You know the one. The one who steadfastly maintains, Rain Man-style, that he is an excellent driver. Yet you know that the simple act of taking the passenger seat with him behind the wheel tends to be an exercise in faith that today is not your day to die. Then there’s that other friend. The borderline racist/misogynist/homophobe/pick your offensive personality type, whose attitudes usually hover just below your tolerance line. He pisses you off regularly, but not enough for you to write him off completely. You’ve known him since childhood, after all. You’re convinced he has a good heart, despite the hard, crusty outer shell. But it is that rare and lucky individual who gets both of these friends all rolled into one ball of lovably hateful delusion.

Quote of the Week

On the Red Line between Farragut North and Metro Center:

Two twenty-somethings on a Friday afternoon during some mild delays:

Guy: “God, what is it with this metro driver? She sucks!”
Girl: “Gah.”
Guy: “Oh please, you know it’s a woman driving this train.”
Girl: “Could you at least PRETEND not to be like that? We all know you hate women drivers but its not nice for everyone in public to know it when i’m sitting right next to you.”
Guy: “Well women drivers suck. It is true. Plus no driver is as good as me. And certainly not this metro chick.”
(pause of about 15 seconds)
Girl: “So when are you going to get your driver’s license, anyway?”
Guy: “I don’t have time for that crap. What do you have to do? I hear they have too much waiting at the DMV.”
Male voice on the PA system: “Next stop, Metro Center.”

After the jump, playing the percentages, ¿Quien es más Asian?, and ab farming.

Your mother probably told you it’s not polite to eavesdrop. What, you’re going to start taking her advice now? overheardindc (at) gmail (dot) com.

Photo by Flickr user birdcage.