Photo by ssdcWelcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
Some people say D.C. has its own dialect: words like “bama,” “jont,” and so on. Maybe this one is making its way in, too.
Overheard of the Week
At El Centro in Georgetown around happy hour:
Two mid-twenty-something guys wearing boat shoes and tucked in plaid shirts are talking about a woman one of them was interested in.
Guy one: “I mean, you like talked her up a few years back. I don’t want to disrespect or whatever.”
Guy two (seemingly thankful for the decision): “Bro. You’re a bro, bro.”
After the jump, cool kids, tourists learning stuff, and jokes about the Punic War.
Overheard in D.C. relies on you to send in the good stuff to our special Overheard in D.C. email address. Make sure you tell us who was talking, to whom, where, when and in what context, otherwise we’ll have to email you back.
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Maybe there’s hope for the future
Big Lots in Alexandria, Wednesday, lunchtime:
A mother and her eight-year-old son are in line next to a big display of family-sized bags of chips.
Kid: “Well those aren’t healthy!”
Mom: “Yeah, but…”
She trails off, grabs two bags of Doritos and throws them in the cart.
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Wossamotta U
While riding on the Silver line:
Guy 1: “Did you hear the University of Minnesota asked the Vikings not to display the word [Washington football team] when they play this fall?”
Guy 2: “that’s ridiculous.”
Guy 1: “So they have no problem with a team name that raped and murdered through Northern Europe for hundreds of years?”
Guy 2: “Golden Gophers??”
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“Yes, but our office can provide coffins”
On the train at Capitol South on August 1st, the day before the Ebola patient arrived in Atlanta:
Two young female Congressional staffers are talking.
Staffer 1: “We had a lot of constituents calling from Atlanta asking if they were going to get Ebola and die.”
Staffer 1: “If they can’t handle a few inches of snow, how could they even handle Ebola?”
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That too, please
On the Silver line on the way downtown on Friday:
Adult tourist parents are traveling with their twenty-something daughter.
Mom: “I’m glad you know where we’re going because I couldn’t understand a word the driver was saying.”
Dad: “Why do they get on the loudspeaker so often?”
Daughter explaining: “They just repeat the line and direction and tell you what stop it is. For instance, we just got off the Silver Line train toward Largo Town Center at the Smithsonian stop.”
Dad: “Oh SILVER LINE is what he was saying. I was a little nervous about what was happening in one of those cars that he kept reminding everyone that this was a ‘Civilized train.’ I thought he was telling people to behave themselves.”
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Way to take a stand, guy
At the Farragut Square food trucks around 12:30pm:
Guy in truck: “Hi, how are you?”
Customer: “Can I have a falafel sandwich—hold the Israeli salad, I don’t support Israel’s genocide of the Palestinians.”
Guy in truck: “Mmm-hmmm.”
Another customer in line: “I’m pretty sure that the cucumber and tomato salad isn’t going to fund Israel’s army, it probably just came from Safeway.”
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Take that, Carthaginian generals
At Tuesday nights Nats game:
The Nats’ Asdrubal Cabrera is called to the plate.
Dad: “If you were a boy, your name would have been Asdrubal.”
Daughter: “Well, good thing I’m not a boy.”
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Foie gras s’mores
On the corner of 15th & P:
Four late twenties people, three guys and a girl, are talking. It seems as if they just finished a fitness class together.
Guy one: “You guys that was so great, I’m telling you, you have to go to the Wednesday class at 5:30.”
Guy two: “Man, that totally ruins my Wednesday happy hour plans.”
Girl starts to leave.
Guy three: “See you next Saturday?”
Girl: “I can’t, I’m going glamping!”
Guy two: “You’re going clamming??”
Girl: “Glamping. Glamorous camping.”
Guys are silent.
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Heard that before!
Leaving Francis Pool around closing time:
A mom and kid—who is about two—are walking out. The kid, wearing just a diaper and t-shirt, looks at the mom and says, “Mommy can we go to the playground?”
Without a moment’s hesitation the mom says, as if refusing an offer from a business client, “No, no we can’t go to the playground, it’s late, you’ve had too much juice, and you’re not wearing any pants. No.”
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And finally, technology has really changed work travel.
In an office:
Dude to co-worker, trying to make small talk: “You Tind’ on the road, bro?”