Photo by volcanojw

Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.

Independence Day is upon us, so we’re doing Overheard a day early in case folks are out tomorrow. The 4th means friends, family, cookouts, concerts, and explosions in the sky. But those cookouts may vary based on where you go.

Overheard of the Week

Waiting for a Green Line train heading north at Anacostia:

A group of four people walking their bicycles join a woman sitting on a bench.

Woman: “Is it a real barbecue or, like, a carrots and celery barbecue?”
Bicyclist: “It’s a Mount Pleasant barbecue.”
Woman: “So a carrots and celery barbecue.”

After the jump, cynics, dates, gay marriage, and athletes.

Our official Overheard email address has changed! Please email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com from now on, and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.

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Cynicism

At the Supreme Court, 30 minutes after the marriage decision:

People are filling up on the steps as the excitement grows.

A young woman is standing with two male coworkers (presumably Hill staffers/interns)

Young women to friends: “Where are all the proposals? I want to see gay proposals!”
One of the male friends: “Oh, that is so outdated.”

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The original Whole Paycheck

In Georgetown:

A couple are walking. The woman points to Dean & Deluca. The man walking with her says:
“Dean & A-Rip-Off? No.”

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Yes, exactly

On Friday night in Lafayette Square approaching the rainbow-lit White House:

Twenty-something woman to her friend: “It’s like Disney World … but the White House!”

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Me doing any sport

At the Wipeout 5k Run on Saturday:

Two twenty-something women are walking towards the starting line: “There have to be a few people here more out of shape than us.”

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Who needs details?

At the counter of a diner on Capitol Hill:

A police officer excitedly shows the woman next to him a photo on his phone.

Him: “Look at my new granddaughter!”
Her: “Awww, sweet! What’s her name?”
Him: [long pause] “Oh shit. Ummm…. it’s a normal name, so it’s hard to remember…”

A few minutes later he suddenly shouts “Elise!”

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Mansplaining!

At Gravelly Point park, while planes are flying closely overhead on approach to National Airport:

Twenty-something man to his date: “You don’t have to worry. They have professional pilots flying these planes.”

——

Been there

At 14th Street and Park Road NW, on a Sunday morning:

Two adults in their mid-forties were standing on the corner talking to each other.

Woman to the man: “It didn’t have anything to do with my work ethic, I just didn’t feel like going to work.”

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And finally:

Early happy hour at a Logan Circle bar:

One thirty-something man to another: “What’s ASL for ‘bitch set me up?'”