Photo by Clif Burns.
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, so check out the archives here.
14th Street has really blown up over the past few years: fancy furniture stores and a zillion restaurants populate the sidewalks these days. It’s like the new Adams Morgan for the 25-35 year-old crowd and it’s crazy on the weekends. There’s fancy cocktail places, fancy Spanish places, fancy French places, and so on. Perhaps we’ve reached Peak 14th Street.
Overheard of the Weekend
Saturday night, 8:45 p.m. crosswalk at 14th and Q Streets NW:
Tall, older burly man 1: “Dude, I am SHIT-TANKED.”
Tall, older burly man 2: “Dude, I am shit-tanked too!”
Man 1: “Pommes frites—are we going to do this??”
Man 2: “Hell yeah! Gotta sop all of that up!”
The men proceed into Le Diplomate.
After the jump, tourists, doofuses and dates.
Our official Overheard email address has changed! Please email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com from now on, and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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I’d listen to that
Near the Capital South Metro on Friday night:
Two twenty-something women.
Woman #1: “I love listening to NPR. The other day I called into the Kofi Annan Show.”
Woman #2: “Do you mean Kojo Nnamdi?”
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Great date
Early thirties couple walking though Eastern Market on Saturday afternoon:
Man: “It smells like incense.”
Woman, several seconds later: “Wait, did you say incest or incense?”
Man: “Incense. God … what’s wrong with you?”
Woman: “I lost my buzz on the Kia ride over.”
They continue through the market in silence.
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Heyo
At the Verizon Center for a Mystics game:
After a non-call of a Three Second Lane Violation, which many which many fans were yelling for.
Yelling fan: “You can’t even park in D.C. for that long!”
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😐
Tuesday on American University’s main campus:
Two smug-looking upperclassmen are watching a horde of freshman cross the street:
Guy: “Oh my God, there are so many freshmen I just want to run them over.”
Girl: “Mike! Freshmen lives matter!”
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Boost of confidence for WMATA
On the 37 bus near Dupont Circle heading East at 8 a.m. on a Wednesday:
A tourist gets on the bus and asks to go to the Washington Monument.
The bus driver turns to all other passengers: “Can anyone help this woman find the Washington Monument!? Honestly, I don’t know anything about D.C.”
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Biking problems?
Sunday morning on the Mount Vernon Trail in Alexandria:
A group of three women are cycling.
Last woman: “My butt doesn’t stick anymore now that I don’t wear undies!”
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Current events
In a Crystal City cube farm discussion on Star Trek:
Guy 1: “I like Star Trek—at least that Captain Crunch guy is still alive!”
Guy 2: “Kirk—it’s Captain Kirk! He’s Canadian.”
Guy 1: “Whatever … But he’s still alive.”
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This sounds super fun
Green Line train from L’Enfant Plaza on Wednesday night:
Two twenty-somethings appear to be on an awkward first date:
He: “Do you like sports?”
She: “Yes: Football, basketball, soccer.”
He: “Who are your teams?”
She: “Carolina Panthers.”
He: “Oh.” (with great disappointment in his voice.)
(Silence and then…)
He: “How long have you lived in Washington?”
She: “Two years.”
He: “By any chance, are you familiar with the name Kathleen Sebelius?”
(Silence.)
“Okay, I’m pretty sure you’ve heard of that whole healthcare thing? You know, Obamacare?”
(Silence.)
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And finally, tourism!
At 13th and F Streets NW:
Teenage girl, visibly upset and tired, flailing her arms, stops in the middle of the sidewalk: “UGHH can’t we just take the Metro??”
Father, looking at map:” It’s just 4 blocks away, we can walk there.”
Mother: “Sweetie calm down, can you not—”
Girl: “UGHHHHHH WHY do we have to go there? It’s just some white house. It’s just some dumb, stupid house that’s white. There are lots of those around, and I can’t believe you even want to go see the inside of it. UGGHHHHH.”