Photo by Rukasu
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
Sometimes people in D.C. make weird twists of logic to suit their political interests or policy goals—we’re looking in your direction, Reps. Andy Harris and Louie Gohmert. Other times, logic is great. Kudos to you, lady.
Overheard of the Week
Morning in wine aisle at Trader Joe’s on 14th Street:
Couple selects a bottle of wine and puts it in their cart.
Woman to man: “I’m just going to get a second for symmetry.”
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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Maybe it’s a really complicated way of pirating
At the Tenleytown/AU Metro:
Late 30s to 40s mom dragging two kids out of Best Buy and into Volvo station wagon, on the phone: “I looked over to see what they were doing on the phone and I noticed they were opening FaceTime to call their dad. I was about to tell them to shut it off because it would bother the other people in the theater, but then just thought ‘What the heck, they don’t talk to their dad very often…'”
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If people say a burrito is a sandwich, what is anything, really?
At the Farragut North Metro walking by Pret a Manger:
Guy to girlfriend: “I don’t know, looks like some type of diner.”
Couple proceeds into Pret.
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This is why kickball in D.C. is no fun
At the Verizon Center for Capitals vs. Bruins, Section 418:
Bro dude: “I am like, fiercely competitive. Like, I’ve lost friends during a flag football game.”
Lady friend: (shakes head agreeably)
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Welcome to academia
The American University Psychology Building:
AU Undergrad: “This is like… a really nice hallway. I’ll bet they paid for it with all of the student loans I’ll never be able to repay.”
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College!
On a Charlotte-bound flight from IAD:
Exceedingly chipper college-age woman is talking to an older man about Dallas:
Man: “I’ve been to one of the other suburbs. I forget which one.”
Woman: “San Antonio? Austin? Houston?”
Later:
Woman: “I go to Marshall University. You know that movie, ‘We Are Marshall’? We just celebrated our memorial Fountain Ceremony. That was really fun.”
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That sounds horrible
At American Ice Company:
A group of late 20’s/early 30’s millenials are talking: “It’s like Taylor Swift meets the Talking Heads.”
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One out of two ain’t bad
At Panera in Dupont:
Woman in 30s protesting to her family as they are making tourist plans in DC: “We’ve done so many historical things. I’ve learned so many things already.”
Mother to the woman: “Okay, who made the first American flag?”
Woman: “The…Roosevelt.”
Later, the same woman: “I didn’t know that the Pentagon was called the Pentagon… because it’s shaped as a Pentagon.”
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When parenting gets less fun
In the Pentagon City J. Crew during the afternoon:
A man to his son who was around 6 or 7: “We need to talk about something. You know how daddy sometimes lets you watch movies for adults?”
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Peak young person
On the 14th Street Circulator on Halloween night:
Sexy cat costume woman #1 to sexy cat costume woman #2: “She’s just like so into her internship right now that she’s like not even in our demographic anymore.”
