Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
Scooters are there. They have fans, they have detractors, but barring something big, they are here to stay.
Overheard of the Week
On the sidewalk on K Street:
Two young women are scootering down the sidewalk.
Woman 1: “We really shouldn’t be riding these on sidewalk.”
They did not move off the sidewalk.
——
Proof that we need more rail in this country?
Tuesday at Union Station around lunchtime:
Two teenagers walking together pause in the entryway to the train terminal.
Teen 1: “Is this an airport?”
——
A good lesson
At Yards Park on the weekend:
A dad is trying to change his 2-3ish toddler’s swim diaper out in the open.
Toddler: “Noooooo!!!”
Dad, struggling to change his diaper: “HEY, it’s OK to show your privates in public!!”
Dad, after a pause: “When you’re an ADULT, it’s not okay…”
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Potato, potahto
At Union Station:
A 9 or 10 year-old boy walking with a woman who may have been his grandmother.
Grandmother: “She is very disrespectful.”
Boy: “Yes. And she tried to kill me.”
Grandmother: “Yes.”
——
Back 2 good!
At 8:45 a.m. in Farragut North Metro:
A crowd of commuters gathers to exit the station.
A mid-twenties woman is clutching a Madewell bag with one hand and her boyfriend with the other. She looks up at him and breathlessly declares: “This is why we don’t ride the Metro.”
——
Boooring
In Georgetown:
A millennial couple is crossing M Street NW.
Man: “Oh, look, there’s a Bird.”
Woman, looking up at the sky: “There are three!”
Man, pointing at scooter: “No, like… a Bird.”
Woman: “…oh.”
——
D.C. landmarks
By Ben’s Chili Bowl on H Street NE:
Two guys in their mid to late 20’s are walking.
First guy: “Oh, Ben’s Chili Bowl—there’s one of those in DCA too, right?”
Second guy: “Right.”
——
The team is finally good again, please don’t joke
On a flight from Dallas to D.C. when members of D.C. United are seated throughout the plane:
The flight attendant is being oddly tentative with the drink cart, and whispers to a fellow passenger: “Can you imagine if I hit one of those knees?”
——
I like this logic
At Lucky Bar on Wednesday around 6 p.m., just after the big storm started:
A group of 20-somethings are sitting together for happy hour. Man takes a drink of beer.
Man: “Gotta stay hydrated, could get struck by lightning.”
——
Enjoying the natural beauty of D.C.
On the Potomac near Key Bridge:
Six intoxicated college dudes are hanging around, some in a boat and some in inner tubes.
Dude: “Look, there are six ducks here and five of us. We should be able to grab one of them.”
——
The Condies?
On the Roofers Union rooftop in Adams Morgan:
There appeared to be a post rehearsal dinner party. Two 20s men are talking
Man 1: “Dude…Sriracha aioli really is the condiment of the decade.”
Man 2: “I wasn’t aware decades had signature condiments?”
Man 1: “This one does. This one does.”
As always, we rely on you to overheard the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.
