Photo by John Crary
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
After the election, a lot of folks have been talking about what happens now: get involved, work in the government, protest, or just talk with friends and family. There are some important issues to think about. For example:
Overheard of the Week
Midnight on a Wednesday night at Room 11:
Two 20-something dudes are talking about politics.
Dude 1: “The neck beard has to go if he wants to be in the Senate.”
After the jump, smart kids, tourists, and murder.
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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Where there’s a will, there’s a way
During brunch at a bar in Petworth:
20-something guy to his friends: “I got tested but then I participated in that orgy so I needed to get tested again. But my insurance wouldn’t pay because it was so soon after the last time. So I donated blood.”
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Or a moonlighting cabbie?
At the corner of 8th and I in Chinatown:
Two thirty something dudes cross the street when a car pulls out of traffic and almost hits them.
Man 1: “Was that dude an Uber driver?”
Man 2: “Nah, he’s just stupid.”
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Don’t tell her how much a latte costs
At Pitango Gelato near Eastern Market:
A mother and young daughter are exiting with some speed.
Mother: “$3.75 for hot chocolate! That is just rude!”
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Maybe get high would be better
Monday morning before the election on a crowded train headed toward Smithsonian Metro from L’Enfant:
Two ladies in their 50s or 60s with luggage are standing near a pole.
Woman 1 “You can go low and hold on if you want.”
Woman 2: “I thought we were supposed to go high?”
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Talk to Alanis Morrissette
On the Red line a few weeks ago:
Two businessman types, maybe in their 40s are chatting.
Man 1: “She and her husband scrimped and saved so they could travel first class in retirement, and he died two weeks later.”
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Make it to the end of block first
Tourist family walking down 7th between D and E in Chinatown:
Daughter to parents: “To be in a city and not see a Starbucks, that’s weird.”
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Truth
On the Red line:
Lady with a very think Brooklyn accent: “No one wants vanilla-flavored soy milk in their mashed potatoes.”
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Let’s just assume she means spoken word?
Outside the White House on Pennsylvania Ave:
Professionally dressed young woman to friend: “I just spat! I’m a champion spitter. I spit…” (walked out of hearing)
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Explain that in your transfer request
College-aged guy in a Lyft line from Foggy Bottom to Mt. Vernon on a Tuesday evening:
The guy gets in flustered while talking on the phone.
Guy: “I was at work today and my eye started twitching. My murder eye started twitchin’.”
(Pause)
“Yeah, I told her if she keeps acting like that that I can go work at a different Starbucks.”
