Photo by Elvert Barnes
Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006, and check out the archives here.
With the growth of Amazon and other online shopping, delivery has become a much more important thing. Here’s a new kind of special delivery.
Overheard of the Week
Rosslyn at Oak St. and Wilson Blvd.:
A man in a truck is upset at where a UPS driver parked.
UPS Driver: “Where do you want me to park?”
Guy in Truck: “Anywhere but here!”
UPS Driver (while walking into delivery building): “I’ll put it up your ass if you want!”
We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.
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It’s very complicated
Around 1 p.m. at the corner of 23rd and G Streets NW:
A group of middle school students were waiting to cross the street and one exclaimed “IT’S JUST SO WEIRD! The streets don’t have NAMES, they’re just LETTERS! I don’t get it!!!!”
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Serenity now!
At the Climate March:
An older woman turns to another woman: “Serenity, can I have a cigarette please?”
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Interesting theory
At the Pentagon City Costco:
Mom to a 6ish year old: “When can you have Jello? When you’re 15. Jello isn’t for kids.”
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Not quite
Near the Lansburgh Theater:
Two 20-something couples are walking under a banner advertising the upcoming STC production of “Macbeth.”
Man: “You guys know what happens in Macbeth? It’s pretty cool.”
Woman: “I thought it was like… a fairy tale?”
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I feel you
Uber ride in D.C. on Saturday night:
Woman to her husband: “Oh good, we’re not passing the Trump hotel. I would throw up in your lap.”
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Hmm
At an OB-GYN office in Arlington:
A woman in her mid-20’s talking to her doctor while getting a sonogram: “Is this what a penis sees?”
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Zzz
Father and five-year-old daughter are walking to the White House Correspondents’ brunch:
Father: “See that church over there? One time Daddy had to go there with President Bush.”
Daughter, unimpressed, continues walking silently.
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Tricky, like street names
Sunday, outside The Diner in Adams Morgan, around 10 a.m.:
Confused early-twenties bro on phone outside: “What do you mean? What other diner could it be?!”
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The customer is always right
At the Soggy March for Science Saturday around the Natural History Museum:
Vendor: “The pretzels are barely wet.”
Woman mumbles something about the rain.
Vendor: “Go to hell and get out of here then, lady.”
