Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006. Check out the archives here.

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.

We are now also taking submissions for eavesdropping on video conferencing calls and all of the other newfangled ways we’re staying in touch. We’re also adding in some greatest hits from the Overheard archives.

Overheard of the Week: 

At the Lincoln Memorial, a group of 20-somethings, a couple of guys and a couple women:

One guy: “Ok, if you were going to date someone from which branch: executive, judicial, or legislative?”

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Go CRAZY girl!

Three 20-somethings riding the Metro Center exit escalator at the start of the weekend:

One says to the other two: “It’s Friday night, we’re definitely having dessert!”

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Rules were made to be broken

A family walking down Carroll Ave. in Takoma Park. Adolescent boy to (presumably) his sister:

“I can’t get a tattoo. I’m fourteen.”

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Nov. 19, 2021: Narrator: He did not “get more girls”

A group of men in their 20s are standing on a sidewalk in Brookland:

One man: “You’re just mad I get more girls than you because I use chicken fat as lotion.”
*The other men did not agree*

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Nov. 8, 2019: Basically nailed it

On Friday, on a bus near the George Washington University campus

Seemingly college or grad student on the phone: “The Washington baseball team won the nationals or something and I think there’s a parade tomorrow.”

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Dec. 23, 2021: That might be hard to wrap

A couple in their 30s is browsing the vendors at the Downtown Holiday Market:

Her: “Oh! We should get something for Rose!”
Him: “Can we get her a better personality?”

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Sept. 27, 2019: Just imagine talking to them

At a cafe table overlooking the canal in Georgetown:

Undergrad girl: “Have you ever seen the finance bros?”
Undergrad guy: “Yeah, they’re awful. Just out there … making money.”

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As always, we rely on you to overhear the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.