Welcome back to Overheard in D.C., DCist’s weekly column of funny, strange, and poignant things that our readers and staff overhear and send in. We’ve been doing it since 2006. Check out the archives here.

We can’t have Overheard in D.C. without your submissions! Email your Overheards to overheard(at)dcist[dot]com and don’t forget to include who was talking, to whom, and in what context.

We are now also taking submissions for eavesdropping on video conferencing calls and all of the other newfangled ways we’re staying in touch. 

Overheard of the Week:

Overheard on Harvard Street NW. Construction crews had spent all day replacing the sidewalk and curb at the corner of the street:

A man’s voice, yelling to someone: “That IS a nice curb!!”

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Well where else is he supposed to keep them

A man and a woman in their 30s walking along E Street NW near 5th: 

Woman: “Did you hear he put his hand up his butt and pulled out the drugs?”
Man: “Yeah, I heard that.”

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So who overheard this? 

Two 20-somethings riding up 11th Street NW on electric scooters, twenty feet apart:

Person in front: “I still can’t hear you!”
Person behind: “I just said something demoralizing and insulting.”
Person in front: “Whatever” (laughs and drives faster).

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Abandon all hope,  ye who enter!

Overheard at Franklin Hall for the 3 a.m. World Cup game. A girl in her mid-20s explaining the Bullpen at Nats Park:

“I didn’t expect so many college kids. I was walking between vape passes, kisses, and gossip.”

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Miley Cyrus getting off the plane at LAX 

On 18th Street in Adams Morgan as big raindrops start to fall when a storm rolls in. Two 20-something women running without umbrellas:

One to the other: “Good thing we brought cardigans!”

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Listening to your body is so important 

40s-ish man on his phone at the Georgetown waterfront on a Friday afternoon:

“No! I’d rather sit on my hemorrhoid pillow than ride a bike!”

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Okay true 

Two 30-something advocacy professionals talking about the unusual pairing of Rep. Matt Gaetz and a young, progressive, female member of Congress working together on an issue:

Advocate A: “I could never work with Gaetz. He makes my skin crawl.”
Advocate B: “Rep. [x] can handle herself. She’s a grown woman. That’s too old for Gaetz.”

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As always, we rely on you to overhear the good stuff and send it our way. Make sure to tell us who was speaking to whom and in what context.