And a Mercedes.

FRIDAY:

>> In “sucks but it’s true” news, the H Street NE scene, while awesomely fun, can still be a dangerous part of town. Argonaut bartender Luis “Quike” Morales was reminded of that fact the hard way late last month, when he was shot in the head while walking home from work. Amazingly, Quike survived, but his mounting medical bills are more than any service industry salary could handle. So head on down to the Argonaut (1433 H Street NE) for a benefit starting at 7 p.m. Your $20 cover, as well as a portion of all proceeds, will go directly to Quike. Plus you’ll be showing the terrorists violent criminals that they haven’t won.

>> If you manage to leave the office early enough to make it worth your while, the annual Small Press Expo kicking off today in Bethesda is a good bet. We told you all about it yesterday, so check out the details over here.

SATURDAY:

>>If you like your environmentalism with just a dash of irony, head inside the cavernous Convention Center to sit inactively at the Green Festival, where you can listen to two full days of speakers, including Del. Eleanor Holmes Norton on Sunday, and another lecture by Chris O’Brien called “Drink Beer and Save the World.” We must already be environmental heroes! More Expo than Festival, $15 will get you a one day pass to check out a building full of eco-friendly companies, including American Apparel and… the City Paper? (Heather Goss)

>> Last year Homecoming Weekend for many of the city’s universities coincided with each other, but this year the schools seem to have figured out how to space them out a little better, and smartly gave Howard University, famous for their Homecoming to end all Homecomings, first dibs. Check out a full listing of Howard’s official Homecoming festivities here (we recommend the Gospel Concert) and of course, be aware of the unofficial festivities, like the endless cruising up and down U Street and the expensive, celebrity-studded parties at clubs like H2O and Love. Word has it there are several “no-cover” parties happening this year that current students can actually afford, such as the DJ night planned for tonight at Jin — and we’re all about cheap and fun instead of flash and “where’d all my money go?”, so count us in for that.

>> Tonight is your last chance to catch David Rees’ hot new political play, based on his comic strip of the same name, Get Your War On. Here’s what our critic had to say: “The endeavor is both an inspired idea and a well-executed one — the comic strip’s lines lend themselves far better to sarcastic or emotive readings than they do to the page.” Read the entire review here. Tickets for either the 8 p.m. or 10:30 p.m. show at Woolly Mammoth can be purchased here.

SUNDAY:

>> Can’t go wrong with a late show of TV on the Radio, one of the most innovative bands to spring up in the last five years, at 9:30 Club. Doors open at 10 p.m. after all the alt-country fans make their way home from the Jenny Lewis and the Watson Twins show. With Brooklyn’s Grizzly Bear, tickets will run you $20.